My blood stained hands

My Blood Stained Hands

My blood stained hands

What set you free.
Rooted me heavy.
Today I'm sinking in a strong under current of guilt.

I killed you.
I killed myself too.
Yes I realize that your emptiness has filled me.

I day dream - I see big red petals in bloom

Spreading on the floor, like blood trickling

Memories in embers.

The moon glows, cold and distant.

Winter gnaws.
I thaw my hands

In ash and burnt wood by the road.

Few days back I was motivated for another life.
Suddenly a million engines stopped inside my system.
"I realize we pretend that we have rights on people.

Such is the illusion of love".

You were so innocent and kind. 

I found 'oblivion' as a dreamer.

Emptied a bag of passion.
Time will heal us.

I want to heal you too.
Give me a chance to help you.

What may bring you back.
May set me free.
Today I wish to wash my blood stained hands.

If I've killed you.
I've killed myself too.
I hope you realize

Your emptiness has filled me.

- Sayan Chakravarty

Shillong, December, 2007